Accidentally Hilarious.

I'm trying to write a song. I'd like to write many songs. And someday I'd like to put them all together and make a little CD out of them. But I get distracted and then I end up watching the season finales of American Idol and Modern Family and the first episode of America's Next Top Model and then I wind up with a blank Word document and another notch on the slacker bedpost. That wasn't even a cliche. That was poor usage of a cliche. I'm definitely not using that in a song. Or maybe I should. "You're just another notch on the bedpost of life Because you're slacking off. That means you're lazy. And you're probably pretty ugly too. But that's just a rude assumption. I take it back. Yeah you're just a notch on the bedpost of life." There. Done. #1 record, here I come. I think if I were to actually write an entire album, it would turn out a lot like something Kimya Dawson would write. If you don't know who ...

I did something drastic this week. I don't know if it was because I wanted to prove to myself that I can be impulsive or spontaneous, or if it was just because I wanted a change. Perhaps it was a bit of both. Either way, I'm not thrilled with the outcome. I chopped off all my hair. I said, "Mom, I want to get a haircut." And so she did what she's always done when I say those words - she called the Hair Depot and set up an appointment for me in an hour. I knew that I either wanted to get bangs, or just to lop everything off. Poof. Gone. Dammit, if I'm going to get a haircut, I'm going to get a haircut. Now, the following is going to seem like a plea for compliments, for you to tell me that it looks great or that I'm so pretty whenever it is that you first see me. I promise you, it is not that in any way, shape or form. This is me simply expressing my current distaste with my state of...head. So please don't take pity on me. I don't need it. (But...